homeward found

Ironic that I "found myself in India", and that is a deliberate play on words. I was always the one to make mockery of those who would say, I'm going to India to find myself or I found myself in India.

I always said the last place I would choose to visit would be , yes India and this is obviously where the irony lies , i say loudly smirking shyly as I whisper to myself ,"oh my god, was I just in India?" this be true I found myself there...

Its debatable if it be the way in which one spiritually finds them self in the way people write books about and base movies upon, no this is not me at all, but I did allow myself to be me. I do not believe it be The place of the beautiful India but the place within the beautiful me, follow?

So I journeyed within me not beside me.

Perhaps in some ways we all posses the ethereal, but that is not my message to myself, simply Ive learnt how much easier I find my life whilst traveling. I'm at ease, i gift myself with balance, the balance of truth,my truth. Thing are open and free. I open with out hesitation or fear, I am the me without the hangups or the fears, I call her the magic me.

I learn each time I travel when I return home, I hold onto that magic, magic being real, I hold and without fail it always fades, I get caught up in everyone else again, my fears like rotten pears touch my pallet,unable to maintain a semblance of calm as I swallow my poison. I loos my free spirit to my closed walls.

Now, I have no desire to do as I always do, why not keep being who I know,who I am so comfortable being, my trueness in essence of my magic that speaks in the magnitude of phenomenal stories, stories which are not just that, but mirrors of not a fading spirit but a well working freeing one.

I am me, when I travel I am me, I walk into myself, I open my door "walk through it" I am me,when I am home, my door is still here, "just walk through it"

its always magical to be who you are, when things are beautiful and even when it hurts , the important thing is : you know who you are