up and away

My mood is very satisfying. Not far fetched at all. I grin. I have had a great day, just superb.


I have giggled and laughed til my stomach hurts. I have given and received. I love doing both, to give is to love to receive is to love(I love!)


I have a mom who I seem to have a luncheon with once a week, and I feel alive when I'm driving towards our beautiful hour. 


I have a therapist whom I obviously see once a week, I feel this energy gliding through my body as I drive to make our 'date'. Be it if my mood is low or high I feel safe. A realness seeps through us both and fills the room with colorful comfort of sorts, magnetic. 


I have a sister I don't see all that often but every time I receive a call from her where she gifts me with her love, I feel a beautiful light fill me,I smile. 


I have a lover who never fails to be passionate with me,today she gave me a 'valentine' and now i wait that look,that kiss,that part where my clothes fall to the ground magically with her touch.Also a special kind of tender crazy.


I have myself who gives and loves without limits and no expectations (well sometimes) and this is just a part of the beautiful people who full my life with so many shades of light.


The point is all these people and more make me feel SO very special and a life with out them would not only be dull but I would have no one to give to and no one to receive from and don't for get 'this is a feel good kinda lovin'


All that said and done I feel so fucking amazing right now: next step(find yourself a home Carey)


I love Valentines day. I love any day where I can give gifts. Not that only happens on special occasions and not that I need an excuse to be romantic, but I fucking love it.

my fingers groove

Well, I'm not entirely sure what goes here today. everything seems to be rockabilly. 
I have had 2 moments of downtime. That means I become very quite and very slow. No one can get in even if they using a drill. No way in, just me in my zone. Those moments don't last very long, thankfully brief. 


Another day of leaving the house to 'quickly' go to the shops and being out for hours. I get sidetracked. I went out to buy paint and I came back 3 hours later with litchis,a microphone,karaoke fun, a new cover for my phone,batteries and paint. I also went searching for a WWJD bracelet(thought it would be fun) I grew bored and returned home. All over the show.


All over the show,dancing,singing,creating. I even spent an hour in the shower. I have spur of the moment ideas and try to do all of them,often at the same time. Painting,while I'm smoking,watching a dvd,kissing and throwing a ball for my dog,all..... simultaneously.


On a drive yesterday we cam across the song I have attached , it took me back to new years eve, a new years eve I spent with my family. You see my cousin and IN to the dinning room to bring up the lowly mood in the room, the Zorba we went. So as I was doing this dance yesterday as I drove, so instead of using m legs I had to pretend my hands were people dancing on the dash board, Don't remember how I drove for those few minutes. But it was pumping out my sunroof and I smiled when I remembered new years eve, just my cousin and I kicking our legs round the table as everyone clapped in sync. Sadly we were stopped when I asked if we could start throwing plates. That spurred another idea , I was to come home and do exactly what I was stopped from doing not so long ago.


I'm having so much fun being me. What a lot of fun it is to be free. 


What else is there: this is more like an update. Update entered. Noted?


I dare you to go and do something unusual to you,something you've always smiled at doing but stop yourself due to social barricades or insecurities. I don't know what yours is, but I know how you might feel, its almost charmingly wicked. You get to choose: Its fun.

siesta es más

I dare you to watch this first then read (if you can)

Wow, my moods do have there own personalities,(that's a given) there own boss. Do what they want when they want and how. and as I come alive to the music of it all my foot taps along with me, my body starts moving, my shoulder go up and down, my smile flows as my eyes widen, I become like an excited child, and whiz off to the floor, i go!


Yes yes, It probably has a lot to do , with the link that is above, and as I type I type with tune and laugh louder every time OLE! My dog looks at me from under her brow, at first she groans and then she growls.I stand i prance I'm on my toes, I clap my hands and go...
she follows me with her big brown eyes as i circle the table my arms in the air, a clap on every hideaway ole! I clap , i skip, i jump, i move, I'm , still, i laugh , i glance , i groove, and then she jumps to the floor and barks. Now its perfect, the song has stopped playing but my voice is still going and my body has not stopped moving, I'm circling the table as my dog starts to follow, Simon says do that, and we pitter patter a bit, and we waltz before i sit, i sit for just a second and up a jump to dance again.
My dog has now lept up on me, she is going completely crazy, i singing eagerly, my voice my dance swooping merrily. i whisper just to calm her down, but know she is as hyped as, so i pull her in and she licks my face, there we waltz again.... OLE!


OK I calm down and calm her down, or so i think, I go outside and light my usual fag, i smoke, i smile,i laugh at myself. I remember why i love this song so much and watching the scene from the movie makes me all the much more merrier. We always listen to and always have listened to a lot of Dorris day and this song on road trips with my grandparents. They don't have a cd player so I always make them rewind or turn over at the right place and i sing with expression from beginning to end, I have done so tonight at least 6 times and it makes me fell happy. HIGH.


smoking my cigarette, surely the moments over and my dog comes out and she wants attention and i start singing " I know a dark secluded place, a place where no one knows your face" her little eyes light up and her tail starts waggling and she know whats coming, and I get louder and i fly to my feet and I'm on my toes and there we are outside with all the neighbours insight (i didn't realise they were outside at first) and we danced and we sang and i just couldn't stop. even the words actually mean different things to me at different times of my life. When i used to listen to it at the back of the car I imagined rocks and caves and beautiful woman, but I like this, its fun.


Most of this was written singing, in the tune of this song, Its not for everyone , It's definitely for me and I appreciate where it takes me.... where no one cares how late it gets...




(PS: i went out of my space at night, I don't do this, she is like a figment of every wild imagination I have ever dreamed up-beautiful, words are probably important to-I will do this more often)  Quiero hacer el amor contigo ?