I have missed my weekly Sunday lunch for so long which means something has been missing in me, today I made Sunday a Sunday again...
As I too my 70 minute journey all along the coast , the driver became the dreamer once again. As I pushed in the clutch softly and changed the gear sliding my hands slowly, I was moved with the control I had on the acceleration, I was moved to a new feeling. The blurred sea aside me and the dunes ahead, I could see.
I felt a calling again, a yearning, a place from my insides traveling above me by air balloon, there I was dangling a rope, "come on already, what are you waiting for" and up I went, I travelled with my thoughts of what if and whens and hows and ways, wheres , i decided to put the "if only's" in a black box in the boot of my car, far far away from my hot air ride.
Through imagery of fisherman and seagulls, baron houses stood still but fallen, crashed cars and fears of the normal "almost high jacking incident" , pastures of I'm in Kenya, no Vietnam, I'm swimming free, to boyes drive where I'm awakened and pulled back by cyclists who hog the road. Let me tell you something about cyclists , I can not stand them, sure ride on your bicycles, but please one behind the other, not two by two on boyes drive, by the time it was my turn to get next to them I let them know all about it. This I don not normally do, it depends on my mood really and they were being cheeky, racing each other up a hill side by side, i wasn't letting that go, I put that hand of mine on my horn,and played a little melody that went something like this : get off the fucking road... In turn they gave me the finger so I politely slowed don my car, almost to a stand still waited patiently for them to catch up and returned the favour, the on my way I went. Only to meet them at the traffic light down the hill again, where they just laughed and off we went.
The surprise:
I arrived at my grandparent and all of us were wearing stripes, it was kinda cute. Something we would probably normally plan for fun, this one was by chance, we sat round that lunch table with Nana's delicious food , our nautical attire munching away---this I have missed, the banter,the laughter,the bitchy comments,the fun,the wit,the love. Anyway before lunch i heard my om from the lounge, she has a very loud voice,rather she is very loud, "Can you come open you pressie ....." I was kind of like huh "what present?" but as I said it I knew "my sister" and there it was onto of the cabinet, the one we were never allowed to go in when we were small, there was a light glowing round this package" My heart sunk and lept\' I stumbled over the couch and everything else in the way as i grabbed it and tore it open, I smiled, my heart warmed at her/your words "i love you everyday, i think of you with your golden heart.
geographically apart but Love never away. Be your truth,Shine your soul, all you hold All I see you are"
I felt her in the room next to me, beside me , holding me, a huge big fat hug, and I embraced you.This came at a time I have been needing you and here you are,here she was.
This put a kick in my stumble and finally I got off my phone as I had been playing on it for an hour. wait for it- i got this app called , here it is "spin the bottle" ah ha, and I play it adding all the names of the girls/woman I crushes on and watch that bottle spin, I did this for an our--- looser please. Its kind of funny though. Come on it is.
My drive home was subtle, I wound down all the windows so I could breathe in the ocean, I played the cd my sister sent me,twice and sang along to some of the songs (loudly) My dog tried to drive us off the road, I stopped for fags, I got home and looked around and realised, I've got to stop sleepwalking.
As I too my 70 minute journey all along the coast , the driver became the dreamer once again. As I pushed in the clutch softly and changed the gear sliding my hands slowly, I was moved with the control I had on the acceleration, I was moved to a new feeling. The blurred sea aside me and the dunes ahead, I could see.
I felt a calling again, a yearning, a place from my insides traveling above me by air balloon, there I was dangling a rope, "come on already, what are you waiting for" and up I went, I travelled with my thoughts of what if and whens and hows and ways, wheres , i decided to put the "if only's" in a black box in the boot of my car, far far away from my hot air ride.
Through imagery of fisherman and seagulls, baron houses stood still but fallen, crashed cars and fears of the normal "almost high jacking incident" , pastures of I'm in Kenya, no Vietnam, I'm swimming free, to boyes drive where I'm awakened and pulled back by cyclists who hog the road. Let me tell you something about cyclists , I can not stand them, sure ride on your bicycles, but please one behind the other, not two by two on boyes drive, by the time it was my turn to get next to them I let them know all about it. This I don not normally do, it depends on my mood really and they were being cheeky, racing each other up a hill side by side, i wasn't letting that go, I put that hand of mine on my horn,and played a little melody that went something like this : get off the fucking road... In turn they gave me the finger so I politely slowed don my car, almost to a stand still waited patiently for them to catch up and returned the favour, the on my way I went. Only to meet them at the traffic light down the hill again, where they just laughed and off we went.
The surprise:
I arrived at my grandparent and all of us were wearing stripes, it was kinda cute. Something we would probably normally plan for fun, this one was by chance, we sat round that lunch table with Nana's delicious food , our nautical attire munching away---this I have missed, the banter,the laughter,the bitchy comments,the fun,the wit,the love. Anyway before lunch i heard my om from the lounge, she has a very loud voice,rather she is very loud, "Can you come open you pressie ....." I was kind of like huh "what present?" but as I said it I knew "my sister" and there it was onto of the cabinet, the one we were never allowed to go in when we were small, there was a light glowing round this package" My heart sunk and lept\' I stumbled over the couch and everything else in the way as i grabbed it and tore it open, I smiled, my heart warmed at her/your words "i love you everyday, i think of you with your golden heart.
geographically apart but Love never away. Be your truth,Shine your soul, all you hold All I see you are"
I felt her in the room next to me, beside me , holding me, a huge big fat hug, and I embraced you.This came at a time I have been needing you and here you are,here she was.
This put a kick in my stumble and finally I got off my phone as I had been playing on it for an hour. wait for it- i got this app called , here it is "spin the bottle" ah ha, and I play it adding all the names of the girls/woman I crushes on and watch that bottle spin, I did this for an our--- looser please. Its kind of funny though. Come on it is.
My drive home was subtle, I wound down all the windows so I could breathe in the ocean, I played the cd my sister sent me,twice and sang along to some of the songs (loudly) My dog tried to drive us off the road, I stopped for fags, I got home and looked around and realised, I've got to stop sleepwalking.
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